The Casual Observer: Interview with a Cave Man (Vol.1) by Rob DeMarco
Interview with a Cave Man (Vol.1)
A friend of mine invented a time machine. He let’s me borrow it occasionally.
I chose to visit prehistoric England, because that is the only language I can speak, and met with a ‘Cave Man’ for lack of a better term.
He and his family lived in a somewhat comfortable cave with a fire burning at the center, drawings on the walls and rocks to sit on.
Casual Observer: Hi, my name is Rob and I appreciate you taking the time for this interview.
Cave Man: Sure Rob. My name is Zub, my wife is Zubi and we have two sons Zuba and Zubo.
CO: What do you do for a living?
Zub: I hunt and my wife gathers.
CO: I see you have discovered how to make fire.
Zub: We don’t know how to make fire. We found a tree that was hit by lightning and caught fire. We dragged it into the cave and keep it going with dry twigs. You know how to make fire?
CO: We use matches.
Zub: How do you make matches?
CO: I have no idea. Do you know that the world is round?
Zub: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
CO: Is Stonehenge near here?
Zub: Yes, as a matter of fact it is just about two kilometers from here.
CO: Wow! Do you know how it was made?
Zub: Yes, but if I told you I would have to kill you.
CO: Do you have the wheel?
Zub: No, but we are working on it.
CO: Do you have any neighbors?
Zub: Yes. One guy stays home and makes bows and arrows. I use them to hunt and we split up the food. The guy in the next cave over from him isa Real Estate Agent.
CO: Do you have a form of currency?
Zub: The stream near here has small pieces of gold we pan for. We have bagfuls of it but nothing to spend it on.
CO: I notice the art on the cave walls. Who did the paintings?
Zub: My wife. She took some art classes at the Adult School, said she needed to get out of the cave once and awhile. She mostly paints animals but those people with the oversized heads and oval eyes land here in spaceships from time to time.
CO: Well, This has been a lot of fun. Can I visit again sometime?
Zub: Sure. Hey, can you bring some matches next time? I’ll give you a bag of gold for them.
CO: OK, that sounds fair.
WPRNPublicRadio.com is a Tampa, FL-based independent public radio platform to inform and entertain, bringing narratives driven by personal stories, connecting listeners to life, along with news and off-beat stories focusing on book readings, essays, arts and culture, and artistic sound portraits. Visit our website to learn more.